Ep. 052 | Music Therapy Assisted Childbirth
Today, we chat with guest, Beth Hardy, a doula and board-certified music therapist, about her experience bringing music into childbirth.
TRANSCRIPT
Erica: Welcome, friends! You’re listening to The Feeling is Musical — as presented by the Snohomish County Music Project. My name is Erica Lee, and today, we chat with Beth Hardy about her experience incorporating music into birth, including writing one of a kind songs for expectant parents, called womb songs. Beth can be found on Instagram @HeartTonesBirth and at www.HeartTonesBirth.com.
[Podcast intro music plays]
Erica: Well, welcome to the podcast. Thank you so much for being here, Beth, I’m really excited to talk about all the things - childbirth, and womb songs, and what it’s like to work in those areas.
Beth: Yeah.
Erica: Um, to get us started, how did you originally become interested in music therapy? What’s your story?
Beth: So, my story with music therapy - surprisingly, I actually started out - I went to music school - I went to Berklee College of Music in - in Boston. But I did not start with in music therapy as my degree. I was like, oh, therapy, like that sounds really hard - and I don’t know if I could do that - I don’t know if I could like get vulnerable with people and go in deep with people. And I was just like, it’s not for me. So I started out as a music business major. And it was fine, um, I was - I think I was that major for maybe a year or so, or maybe 2 years - I forget.
And then - my own life - personal circumstances happened in my life, in my own family, and I’m in recovery, um and so that shifted a lot for me. Of like, seeing that there’s so much more out there - there’s so much more as a human being when we get vulnerable with ourselves, and when we actually are honest about things. Um, it just made me see, oh my gosh, uh maybe music therapy is the right path for me. Because I could potentially use my musical gifts, and my talents and skills, to help other people to achieve some of the - some of the wellbeing. I have been able to achieve in the past whatever it was at that time in my life - where I was able to take some time for self care and really dive into my own wellness. So —
Erica: Mmm —
Beth: I changed majors, and was lucky enough to get into the music therapy degree at Berklee. And it was just - I mean, it was incredible. You know, I think once we find what we’re supposed to do in our lives, I think, it just feels so right and comfortable - it just feels like the right fit. So I finished Berklee - I think I graduated in ’08 I wanna say. Started out working mostly with older adults - actually in veterans’ homes - I worked in California at different veterans facilities - hospitals and things. And, during that same time, I also was training to become a doula, and starting to see where music therapy could potentially overlap with birth work.
Erica: Mmm, yeah. What’s the path or transition from education to like being a music therapist, to like doing your internship, to wanting to become a doula, and - and starting to pursue that training?
Beth: Yeah. So, for my whole life, I’ve always been super interested in birth for - for some reason. I don’t know why - like, my mom wasn’t a - a birth worker or anything like that. But it was always something that I was like really curious about. And initially kinda thought maybe I would become a midwife - but again, like that didn’t seem like the right fit - [chuckles] it seemed to hard.
[Erica laughs]
Beth: [laughing] Part of me was like, what can I do that’s like adjacent to that but not so hard? However, I found that doula work, again, has its own challenges. There’s no easy work, right?
Erica: Yeah.
Beth: It’s like, when we’re doing work that’s heart work and emotional work, it’s never gonna be an easy path. But yeah, so I knew I always wanted to do something with birth. And, I think it was after I graduated from college and I was kinda working a little bit as a music therapist - I just started kind of looking I think online. Just like, what is - what is a doula, what do they do, how do I become one? Um, the thing about doulas is there’s not really a national certifying body - you don’t even have to be certified to practice as a doula. You can just say, I’m a doula, here I am, and just like start practicing —
Erica: Oh —
Beth: Which I don’t really love. I mean, I think, in some respects, I - I also don’t think that necessarily certification should be a requirement, because it limits who can then become a doula - you have to be able to afford trainings/you have to be able to afford certifications. And it - it becomes this kind of um club, right? Where it’s like not everyone can then do that —
Erica: Yeah —
Beth: Whereas, right now, it’s like - it’s wonderful, in many ways. Because people who are from all socioeconomic statuses, all different races, and - and genders, and everything can just, you know, do the work to become a doula. If someone who’s listening is interested in becoming a doula, I definitely would recommend at least taking a training, and like going through that process —
Erica: Yeah —
Beth: Whether you become certified is - is up to you. But definitely not just like saying you’re a doula and just going to a birth. Because you’re not going to really be able to do what you need to do to provide support for that person that’s birthing.
Um, for the first several years, doula work was just something I did very very sporadically. Like, once or twice a year I would just be able to attend a birth. And it was never something I was able to really dive into fully. It - it’s the kind of work that feels a little bit less financially stable probably - ‘cause some months I have 0 births - some months I have 5 or 6 births. It just depends on who hired me at that time. And so, I knew I wanted to keep my stable paycheck job, and then keep doula work on the side.
Erica: Yup.
Beth: And then I moved to Utah in 2015 - Salt Lake City. And my partner, Spencer, got a job - fulltime job with benefits at a hospital - he’s a music therapist as well, so he works in a pediatric hospital here —
Erica: Mmm —
Beth: And that gave me the opportunity to be like, okay, like he’s got the benefited job. I’m gonna go and like jump into my new business and expand my music, my doula work specifically. And that’s kind of wear Heart Tones Birth and Music Therapy was - was born if you will.
[Erica and Beth laugh]
Erica: That’s awesome. Can you tell us then a little bit about like what your practice entails currently?
Beth: Yeah. So I - I would say that these days, I’m actually probably about 90% just straight doula work, and then 10% music therapy associated with that work as well. What I offer now: I do offer music therapy assisted childbirth, which is working with. A pregnant person - often also am their doula at the same time but that doesn’t always have to be the case. And what I do with them is really get into a. deeper discussion about their musical preferences - their likes and their dislikes, why they like certain kinds of music, the emotional connections that are there with that music - and begin to formulate and put together playlists that they can then use during labor. And a lot of the playlists that I create, there will be some that are specific for that person - that I create for them with their preferred music - other ones that I already have that I created in the past. And I can kinda connect them with which ones fit with their preferences, and give them those playlists.
Um, if I’m also their doula, I would be attending their birth as well. And during that birth, I would be putting on the music that feels like it corresponds best with each stage of labor. As they progress through the labor process. Um, the music would also progress and change to help them to feel comfortable in a familiar environment, help them feel calm, help them feel connected to themselves and to their partners, if there’s a partner there, to their baby - um, help them feel grounded, and really tap into that inner strength that they need to labor and to have a baby. Um, if I wasn’t going to be there as their doula, I would make sure that their partner or their doula - or whoever’s gonna be their birthing support person - feels very comfortable using the music too, so that they can kinda be the ones to be putting the music on, turning it off if needed, um and kinda being that person in the moment to put the music on.
That’s one piece of what I offer, and - and another piece is the womb songs. And I’ve actually found that that has been the most um - the thing that people are most interested in, regarding the music therapy work that I do. And I think it’s also my favorite part as well. So it really is wonderful, ‘cause I love - I love writing the songs, and I think that they are just such a unique and meaningful uh gift for people to give themselves and give their babies - and to have for the rest of their lives.
Erica: Yeah, absolutely.
Beth: Yeah.
Erica: In the music therapy-assisted childbirth - you were talking about the playlists - is there a live music aspect to it also, or is it pretty um just like use of pre-recorded music?
Beth: So it’s actually mostly just use of pre-recorded music. However, in the moment, like we could do vocalizing, we could do toning, I could help someone to use their voice in the moment. Especially if they’re already a musical person - or maybe a singer, or someone who’s like comfortable in using their voice in that way.
Erica: Mmm.
Beth: Um, using one’s voice while they’re laboring is incredibly powerful. Even if someone isn’t a singer and they don’t quote unquote like sing during labor, but just using that voice to have an open tone, to have a low, deep kind of tone. Um, it’s such a powerful connection between the throat and the cervix, and the areas that need to open, and - and release tension, and expand in order to let a baby through. And so, I do encourage my clients, when they’re comfortable, to do that - to use their voice in labor. But it isn’t live music like me bringing a guitar or playing an instrument necessarily during labor, because the typical first time labor is - at least typically, 24 hours —
Erica: Mmm —
Beth: Maybe more? And that’s a really long time to be incorporating music with someone.
Erica: Yeah.
Beth: So, instead of trying to come at it with like, oh, I’m gonna do live music, I kinda come at it with: I’m going to bring music in whatever way this person needs, whether that’s recorded playlists that we’ve created, or whether it’s using our voices in the moment. And that’s kinda how it’s been, which has been working pretty well.
Erica: Yeah.
Beth: Um, one thing about the playlists that I wanted to mention too is that we’re not just using them during labor, but I’m encouraging people, and showing them how to, to practice with them prenatally. So, in the last trimester/last few months of their pregnancy, starting to use those playlists. What I’m telling them is I want them to use them at least - every - every night if they can, or every couple times a week if they can’t do it every single night. But to create a routine with the playlists. And so, I create a nightly practice session playlist specifically —
Erica: Mmm —
Beth: What I’m encouraging them to do is to do their yoga stretches, is to do their nighttime bath routine, is to do their deep breathing. Anything that they’re kinda starting to do to calm down for the night and go to sleep and - and incorporating that music, so that they’re really training their body to relax to the music. And so, when they hear it, after a while, they’re body doesn’t even need to be reminded to relax - it just relaxes. It just happens because they’ve done it so many times. And so, a huge part of music therapy-assisted childbirth is that practicing the music before. It’s a little bit more in depth than just putting music on in the moment in labor - it’s that we’re creating space where you have a physical reaction to the music to relax, because you practice it - with it so many times. And —
Erica: Mmhmm —
Beth: You’ve given your body that much time to get used to that experience, you know?
Erica: Yeah. Absolutely.
Beth: Yeah.
Erica: So, when typically do you start working with someone that’s pregnant then about to give birth, and … does that start like in the second trimester? Or like, how early can you start work with them?
Beth: It really depends. Like, I’ve been hired by people really early, when they have - they’re like 1 month pregnant and they’re like, I know I want a doula - I know I wanna do this - I know I wanna work with you or whatever. I’ve also been hired by people who are like, I’m due in 3 weeks, can we work together. [Chuckling] So it just depends on where they’re at.
Erica: Mmm.
Beth: So I usually start meeting with people, for our prenatal sessions that we do, probably around 28 to 30 weeks pregnant. And a typical pregnancy lasts about 40 weeks, so that’s about 10 weeks or so before the baby theoretically is set to arrive.
Erica: What can a person or a family expect, in terms of like before, during, and then after birth?
Beth: So, what I offer as a doula - and I - I’ll speak mostly to the doula piece as opposed to the music therapy piece for the moment. So, I work in a doula partnership, which is really nice, so there’s two of us that work together. And that gives our clients kind of a ‘to heads are better than one’ scenario, where they’re getting two doulas - they’re getting both of our expertise. Right now, because of - of COVID that we’re in the midst of at the moment, we’re - we’re increasing our prenatal sessions. So we used to do two, now we do four - just to give people that much more time with us, and really get to know us and feel like they can connect and feel that really good trust and bond. A huge part of doula work is making sure that the clients who hire us hire us because they feel like we’re the really best fit for them —
Erica: Mmm —
Beth: And it feels like a very like comfortable relationship, because birth is one of the most intimate and vulnerable moments in someone’s life. So, during our prenatal sessions, we teach them and their partner techniques of how to cope with labor. So even if someone’s like, no, I wanna get the epidural as soon as possible, there’s still gonna be time before they get an epidural - no matter what - you can’t get an epidural the minute you get your first contraction.
Erica: Yeah.
Beth: And so, teaching them positions that are great to labor in to help the baby move down and progress. We’re teaching them massage techniques that feel really good, we’re teaching them counterpressure, which is putting pressure on the hips and the back and certain places that feel really good during labor contractions. We’re teaching them how to relax during an intense sensation in their bodies, we’re teaching them how to connect with their partner and make sure they’re communicating well with each other so they feel like they’re getting what they need from their partner.
So those are our prenatal sessions. We start, again, like at 30 weeks or so. And then we go on-call for our clients 2 weeks before their due date. And, for those of you who don’t know - who haven’t had babies - babies can come any time within like usually like 2 weeks before the due date and 2 weeks after the due date is a pretty good estimate - some time within that month - so it’s really like a due month instead of like a due date.
[Erica chuckles]
Beth: And what it means to be on-call is that we’re pretty much available 24/7. We’re just like here, ready and waiting - any time. So that whenever they do go into labor, they can call us - we can go into their home or we can meet them at the hospital - wherever they’re birthing. And we’re there throughout the entire labor. We stay for a couple hours after the birth to make sure that, if the parent wants to feed the baby with their body, that we help them to like get that process started. We also make sure that both the parent and the partner have had a meal, and are like ready to snuggle in with their baby, and like have that little alone like quiet bonding time. And then we leave.
We check in with our clients with two postpartum visits, so we - we see them in-person twice after the baby comes. And during those visits, we are processing their birth a little bit with them. Um, I mean the birth processing - I mean the - the integrating the experience within one’s own mind and life can take years. I mean to really think about: what happened, how was that for me, was their trauma —
Erica: Yeah —
Beth: Was it empowering, was it scary, was it incredible - all the things. It might have been all of the things at once.
[Erica chuckles]
Beth: And so, we start the process of talking to them about it. And just like, what was that like for you? Here’s what I saw as your doula - here’s what I noticed. Or what did you think about this happening, or what did you think about that happening? And just like talk to them about that process. And their partners - making sure their partners have a moment to like share their experience of like, whoa, that was like whoa, you know, just huge —
Erica: Yeah —
Beth: And [garbled word] and life-changing. We also give them a timeline of their birth. So, throughout the birth process, we’re keeping a note on our phones of when key events happened during labor, just so they can have those in their records somewhere. Because it can feel like there’s no sense of time really when someone’s in labor, and so they don’t always know - like, when did that happen? How long was I doing that? Or how long was I pushing for? And so having a record of that can be really helpful for them.
And then, after our two postpartum visits, we conclude our services then. It’s a pretty in-depth and like long relationship usually with people, where it’s over several months. Um and it’s just an incredible - incredible thing.
Erica: Yeah, it sounds so cool. And like a really cool kind of thing to do.
Beth: Yeah.
Erica: You had - had mentioned the womb songs in like part of what your work is. What is a womb song - yeah?
Beth: So, womb songs are one of a kind, unique songs that are written specifically for someone’s baby - usually written before the baby’s born. And what I’m doing with the song is I’m incorporating the parents’ words into the music - into the lyrics.
Erica: Mmm.
Beth: And so, what - what the process is is I meet with a parent - expecting parent, or parent and partner. We talk for about half an hour, I ask them questions about their pregnancy so far, I ask them questions about what they want their baby to know - if they could tell them anything in the world, what would they tell them right now, what do they hope that their baby remembers, what do they hope that their baby comes into this life knowing —?
Erica: Mmm —
Beth: Um, and I try to get them like really talking about the emotional piece, right. Like that depth like: pregnancy is a huge shift, but like, we’re just living our lives when we’re pregnant - we’re just like, oh yeah, I haven’t thought about like I’m gonna have a baby in a month.
Erica: Yeah.
Beth: Like, it comes and goes in my mind, right, and I’m just like doing life. I’m trying to do laundry, I’m trying to cook dinner. And people aren’t always connecting to their baby in like that deep way of like, whoa, like, I want you to know this about me - I want you to know that I’m always gonna be here for you, I’m never gonna leave you, I love you no matter what - whoever you are - whatever. Those kind of phrases and things.
Right, so um, as we’re talking, I’m taking down word for word notes of everything each person is saying, and I’m also asking them about their musical preferences - if they have a song they’ve already started singing to the baby, if they have a song that’s like special that they want to incorporate in some way, whether it’s like a line of the lyrics from that song or a melodic piece from that song that you kind of want to incorporate into this original song. We finish our conversation, and then i, over the next couple of weeks, I go through that transcript, and I pull out phrases and themes, and kind of ideas that pop out at me as meaningful and important. And I start to put those into a song. I record a rough draft, email that to the parents and say, here’s what I’m thinking, what do you think? They give me any edits they want - if there are any, and then I do a final recording. I usually record it with my voice and some harmonies, and then I also record an instrumental track so they can use it as kind of a background track if they wanna sing the song.
Erica: Mmm.
Beth: I do encourage all my womb songs clients to sing - to learn and sing the song to their babies. And like, I hear from them later down the line, you know, 6 months or 2 years later, they’re like, oh my god, this is the song we sing to our kid every single night before they go to bed —
Erica: Mmm —
Beth: Or this is the song we play when they’re like sad, or when they’re nursing, or whatever it is. And so, it usually becomes a really big part of their routine and their lives. Um, it’s actually been really cool. Some studies have shown that babies - even newborn babies - show a preference for their own parents’ voices.
Erica: Mmm.
Beth: They’ll turn their head more often towards like their birth parent/their mom’s voice, rather than a stranger’s voice, or their partner/their dad’s voice, right. Even if a parent feels like, I’m not really a singer, like, it doesn’t really matter to your baby. Your baby loves your voice - doesn’t matter what it sounds like - even if you’re just sitting there, like humming a random tune, or singing the ABCs, or singing some song, you know, you liked from your childhood - it’s that connection, that bonding, and just, that experience is more powerful than whether or not your voice sounds a certain way to your baby. They just love it no matter what.
Erica: Yeah. How did your training experience as a music therapist inform how you practice as a doula?
Beth: I think the fact that I was able to get a degree in music therapy, do an internship, practice for several years - like before really jumping in to doula work - it just gave me so much um more knowledge about how to be present with people.
Erica: Mmm.
Beth: Um, how to like be in the moment, in their emotions with them, at that moment, right. And not fixing it really. And just like giving them a space, and a reflection/mirror to to like, here’s what’s happening for me right now, and to be that person that can say, yes - here’s what’s happening for you right now. And here I am, witnessing it, and seeing it, and verbalizing to you that I - I’m seeing it.
And that - that presence and that grounded-ness and connection with people, is like - that’s all that birth work is, really. Like, there’s the hands-on stuff, but like, really, it’s just: how much can you be in someone’s raw, emotional pain, and joy, and fear, and grief, all at the same time. How much can you sit in that and just like be in that soup, right, and just like yes, we’re in it - it’s here, it’s all around us. There’s a moment in birth where like the birthing person has to let go of all control. Like, they realize, at some point in birth, oh like, I thought I could plan, I thought I could read all the books, I thought I could control it - I thought I could be the one who is in charge of this experience. And yes, you are in charge of your birth. And, there’s a moment in birth at some point, where you have to like let go, and just like [blows out a breath] fall off that cliff for a minute. And know that like, that you’re gonna get caught - and you’re gonna be okay - and I can just hold that space for them, and like be witness to it.
Erica: Mmm.
Beth: There’s so much of that in birth. And that’s where like, I’m getting like chills just talking about it. ‘Cause it feels - like, that’s where the work is - that’s where the power is. Witnessing someone - someone’s life literally changing right in front of your eyes - and never gonna be the same again. It’s like [blows out air mimicking an explosion] it’s fricking awesome! It’s incredible!
[Erica and Beth laugh]
Beth: It’s incredible, yeah.
Erica: Wow. Yeah! We are coming to the end of our time for today. Do you have any closing thoughts or anything we haven’t talked about that you would like to share?
Beth: My take always - hopefully from today that people will take away - is that: you know, making music with your child, you know, singing with your child is incredibly bonding and helpful in that experience of bonding and - and soothing a child. Also, that, you know, birth is a transformational experience, and, you know, the people that are around you in that space should be people you feel uplift you, and hold you, and help you to feel like your most validated and most seen self.
Yeah. So, I am at HeartTonesBirth.com is my website. And through that, you can see my doula work, you can see womb songs, you can hear examples of womb songs that I’ve written. So HeartTonesBirth.com - you can also find me - I’m most active on Instagram @HeartTonesBirth. Instagram is where you can find me, and my website as well. Yeah —
Erica: Awesome. We will put all the links and all that stuff in the episode notes and on our website so that people can find you easily. Um, awesome. Thank you so much, Beth, for sharing and chatting. And I appreciate your time.
Beth: Yeah, thank you so much for having me —
Erica: Absolutely —
Beth: A pleasure to talk about it with you.
Erica: If you’d like to know more about the music project, please visit our website at S as in Sam - C as in Cat Music Project dot org (SCMusicProject.rg). On our website, you can find transcripts for every podcast episode. We encourage you to connect with us on social media @SCMusicProject - never miss notifications for new episodes and other projects.
Thanks, Beth, for being here today. Thank you, listeners, for listening. And we will talk to you next time.
[Podcast outro music plays].